Things I will (not) tell my pregnant friend

- No, you will not be fat. You will be huge, but you will be beautiful. You will have the 'super hormones that make me glow'-halo. Your hair and nails will be gorgeous. And you will get to wear all the funky, cute and sexy collection of clothes for mums-to-be. Some years ago pregnant women had to look dull, today they have clothes to die for. Perhaps stiletto heels are not exactly matching, but hey

- No you can not pig out on the pregnancy excuse, you can enjoy your food but you should try to avoid putting on 25 Kg that you will regret. Because you will regret

- There is no good food and bad food for the foetus, if you feel like hamburgers that's what you should eat; dont torture yourself with wholemeal and quinoa. No alcohol and no smoking though, that's serious

- Basically, you only realise that you are carrying a baby once half of the time is over, i.e. after month 4-5, and then time flies. It is not that long after all

- Pregnant ladies are queens, and you should pamper yourself. Do the things you feel like. Expect to be treated like one. Expect people to give you their seat in the metro, ask for it.

- Yes it hurts. But I wont tell you how much or for how long, because it doesn't matter. Everyone has a different story to tell, and yours will be a different one too

- Dont let others tell you about miscarriages, or other sad stories, it is like talking about divorces in someone's wedding. No need to ruin your day

- Don't be afraid about how you will look post-birth. You will look just fine, if not better than now

- Mums get all passionate and judgemental about their choices - natural birth or cesarean, birth at home or in hospital, induced or not, with doctor or with 'sage femme', breastfeeding or bottle. There is no right and wrong, it is whatever makes more sense for you, but you should be aware of the consequences and risks involved. Don't choose on the basis of whether that sounds cool, cute, or is in vogue

- Mums-to-be are ready to spend as much as they can. But nobody ever tells you what are the things you absolutely need to buy for the baby, what would be helpful but you could also live without, and what is unnecessary. You definitely don't need to spend thousands of euros. You end up using half of what you buy

- Next time you are about to buy that super expensive fair trade blanket made of organic fabric, remember: babies pee and pooh. All the time. Huge mess. Not worth the 80euros. Some 15 euro cotton blanket made in China would be just fine.

I wrote this post for a non-Greek speaking friend; a similar post in Greek is here